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View Full Version : Help! I'm Miserable and I Can't Cheer Up!



IndoorGirl
2003-04-07, 02:43
Hi Everybody,
I just wrote a lengthy post, then I was booted off the computer, so I lost every bit of it, lol. Serves me right for whining.
At any rate, my hubby, Whittler, left seven days ago for his first thru hike, and I am beyond miserable. I can use any advice and/or support available. I am growing weary of crying every morning whilst I make the coffee, and I would rather bite the head off a live chicken than ask him to come home.
Thank you for your patience,
Indoor Girl (aka Whittler's FooFoo)

jumpngeorge
2003-04-07, 06:58
Did Whittier plan to "come home one leave" during his hike? He's probably missing you just as much.

Plan a visit to him on the trail, keep a journal, write long letters...

chief
2003-04-07, 09:23
advice from my sis (while her husband was hiking with me in 2000): stay busy. do all the little projects you've been putting off. gather your friends and family around. let them bear your burdens! hehe.

advice from me: when you talk to yer hubby, be encouraging (happy, happy), let him know you miss him, but not too much - it's the same as biting the chicken's head off!!!

chief

Lone Wolf
2003-04-07, 09:31
Be happy and thankful he's not in Iraq. At least he can call you every 3 days or so.

IndoorGirl
2003-04-07, 13:04
Good morning everybody (side note...do you remember how Fred Flintstone used to grumble and swear under his breath? That was me this morning as I made the dreaded pot of coffee...I'm not sure why I must cry every morning while I make it, but I do, lol):

I did very well the first few days working (I work from home, usually 12 - 18 hours a day, 7 days a week), calling friends and tidying up the house, etc., but on day four I started to lose steam. Whittler did call me Friday from Neel's Gap, and he sounded so happy. I was very relieved to hear that he has been hiking off and on with others...he has chronic health issues, now in remission, and this may be his only chance to complete a thruhike...but I was very worried about the possibility of him getting sick on the trail without anyone around to help him. Of course, he met many other hikers on the Internet, at Trail Days and in Harper's Ferry last year, so I know that there are some folks who know he has health issues and are keeping a bit of an eye out for him. Too, I've been reading "On the Beaten Path" so I am beginning to understand about the northbound sense of community, the trail registers, etc. I also didn't realize how close the AT was to populated areas in case emergency help was needed.

Anyway, one thing I've gotten from reading the book as well as lurking in these forums, etc., is...rather envious :-). I wish I wasn't such a pansy, I could be with him right now, and immersing myself in the same phenomenon he is. Of course, it's not really do-able financially etc., and I am sure that my out-of-shape butt wouldn't make it ten miles, but I do have an inkling of what he must be so attracted to.

But I digress...I am rambling. Whittler has encouraged me to visit him at Klingman's Dome, Damascus and/or Harper's Ferry, but I'm not sure I'll be able to for financial/logistical reasons. He never mentioned taking any time off the trail, particularly since his pace may be rather slow at times due to his health, and he has the deadline to think about. I am so grateful that he can call me once a week or so when he stops for supplies, and of course, I am even more grateful that he is on the AT and not in Iraq (I just began reading dixicritter's posts re: SGT Rock).

Thanks for letting me vent, and for the advice. If I can get a little off this off my chest here, then perhaps it will be easier for me to keep my big mouth shut when he calls me (as chief wrote, happy, happy, lol).

Best Regards, Indoor Girl

dixicritter
2003-04-07, 20:43
Indoor Girl,

Let me just first say, I know exactly how you feel. Its not easy to sit at home and wait for your hiker to return. You've gotten some very good advice here so far. I agree with the others who say, keep busy. Not only does it occupy your mind but the time passes so much faster.

AT or Iraq, its not fun when your husband is away for a long time. I'm glad to hear from another spouse that for one reason or another doesn't hike. ;) I was beginning to think I was the only one out there...lol.

Find something that you enjoy doing and go do it. Trust me, if you sit around thinking you'll drive yourself crazy. Look up a friend you haven't seen in a while and get reaquainted. Take up a hobby. Whatever works for you. Just like for them its "hike your own hike" for us its "wait but stay sane." I know you can do it!!

dixi

jumpngeorge
2003-04-07, 21:35
My son and I were walking the Long Trail up in Vermont. We were on the part that is also a part of the AT. On our third day out my son cut the holy crap out of his thumb. I wrapped it up. We both went over to the shelter to see if by chance any of the thru hikers at the shelter were doctors, no luck. While we were talking a guy walks by with his dog...No canteen, no pack...I asked him how to get to the nearest road. He told go down the path, around the corner and over the fence...Zeke and I were literally in the emergency room 30 minutes after he cut his thumb. And most of that time was pack up our gear...Now every where on the trail isn't like that, but the isolation of the trail is an illusion. But your husband will cross some kind of road every couple of days. He will rarely go a day without seeing several other hikers. He will almost never sleep alone (hold it...that doesn't sound like the kind of thing one would say to reassure a worried wife! You know what I mean.)

IndoorGirl
2003-04-07, 22:53
Originally posted by jumpngeorge
He will almost never sleep alone (hold it...that doesn't sound like the kind of thing one would say to reassure a worried wife! You know what I mean.)

ROFLMAO...that is too funny. Boy, I needed that, thank you jumpngeorge :D I do really appreciate your explaining to me the illusion of isolation at many points along the trail. I hope your son recovered well :-).

Dixicritter...thanks so much for your input. I am relieved to know that there are others out there like me, too :-). I feel so guilty for being such a baby about this. I was super-encouraging and supportive until a week before he left, then I just started telling him that I was really nervous, which wasn't bad...but then the day before I resorted to alternately hiding in my home office pretending that is wasn't happening and giving him those pleading looks, lol. Poor Bonzo, who met up with him at our place and caught a ride to Springer mountain with a friend of ours, must think I'm some sort of head case :D

Maybe I'll make the coffee tonight and just heat it up in the microwave in the morning, lol.

Thanks for everything,
Indoor Girl