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View Full Version : Walmart & Starbucks strike AT deal



SolarBronco
2011-05-03, 17:54
My name is Mr Katz, I am writing from the law office of Meyer Levinson and Bryson to infom you that I represent Starbucks and Walmart. We have just come to a shared agreement to place Starbucks stands on each major roadcrossing of the AT. Walmart will also be opening booths at each road crossing and will also be delivering food, Alcoholic Beverages, and assorted snacks to most of the shelters that reside within 8 miles of each road crossing.

Walmart also has tentative plans to offer Direct TV and Phone service in each shelter, with solar and Wind technology to be provided by Best Buy.

Newer style Privy's will be installed with running water and hot showers, provided by Lowes. Privy/shower use will be fee based as well, $5.00 per use and that includes a towel, with debit card security deposit.

In addition, Walmart will be providing workers to carry Backpacks for you on each elevation gain that totals 2,000 FT or higher. Walmart also has plans to install Escalaters at Amicalola Falls by summer 2012, with plans to extend esculater service to the summit of Springer Mountain by Summer of 2015.

Lastly, Walmart and the Home Depot also have plans to make the AT entirely Handicap Accessable. They will begin paving the Ga AT in 2012, and will be paving the entire trail to Mount Katahdin by 2019. Motorized Golf Carts will be availible to rent at each shelter, to be provided by Calloway. Grayson Highlands will be the home of an exciting new 18 hole golf resort with helicopter service, Horseback riding, Polo arena, and Hiker Viewing areas, where paid guests can view professional thru hikers navigate the trail in their golf carts. Golf carts will be mandatory in Grayson Highlands as to discourage mixing with the paid guests. Thru hikers are allowed to stay at the resort with prior reservations. A special "Hiker Shower" will be installed at a checkpoint close by.

Please be patient with minor delays, traffic, construction and occasional trail closures as we implement these wonderful upgrades.

And continue to enjoy the new trail!

cool breeze
2011-05-03, 18:10
Damn son you've been busy.

Bearpaw
2011-05-03, 18:37
Awesome. Resupply and caffienation just got easier!

Tin Man
2011-05-03, 19:00
Um, who wants to break the news to RH about Walmart taking such an active roll? :ahhhhh:

Rockhound
2011-05-03, 19:01
Someone has too much time on their hands.

Two Speed
2011-05-03, 19:13
Coming from you that is indeed harsh.

Cuffs
2011-05-03, 19:25
And sometimes the truth comes out...

dixicritter
2011-05-03, 19:26
And sometimes the truth comes out...

It has been known to happen around here.:angel:

Hog On Ice
2011-05-03, 19:33
rarely but it has been known to squirt out

Gray Blazer
2011-05-03, 20:24
What's with the new clever threads? This makes 2 in one day.

Two Speed
2011-05-03, 21:11
Trolls. See the red text in the OP; getting all the respect they deserve.

Tin Man
2011-05-03, 22:19
What's with the new clever threads? This makes 2 in one day.

I think they were chased away from the other site...

http://fundapk.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/alligator-pictures-19.jpg

Nearly Normal
2011-05-03, 23:33
I think they were chased away from the other site...

http://fundapk.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/alligator-pictures-19.jpg

Ha!
:beer:

JAK
2011-05-04, 01:16
Did I mention that I was some sort of a prince from New Brunswick. I have inherited these giant vats of beer over at Moosehead Breweries, which I am willing to share with you guys. But I need like, I don't know, maybe 2 case of beer or maybe some of that southern hooch in order to cover the legal fees. Please help.

dixicritter
2011-05-06, 10:33
Oops, not a spammer... just someone who jumped in trying to be funny in the wrong forum. Sorry about that.

SolarBronco
2011-05-09, 17:56
Sorry about that, guys. Was trying to be a smart azz, and looks like I did too well.

Will trim back on the humor a bit.

Bearpaw
2011-05-09, 18:23
Sorry about that, guys. Was trying to be a smart azz, and looks like I did too well.

Will trim back on the humor a bit.

Don't hold back. Humor is allowed as long as you're not a dirty spammer whose momma didn't raise him right. :angel: :beer:

Kanga
2011-05-09, 19:00
Sorry about that, guys. Was trying to be a smart azz, and looks like I did too well.

Will trim back on the humor a bit.

you're fine. your standards might be a little high though. we're retarded. you gotta dumb it down a little.:angel:

Superman
2011-05-09, 22:45
and you use too many words. Think more in terms of knock knock jokes.:angel:

sheepdog
2011-05-09, 22:51
and you use too many words. Think more in terms of knock knock jokes.:angel:

who's dere??

Hog On Ice
2011-05-09, 22:52
banana

sheepdog
2011-05-09, 22:52
banana who?

Hog On Ice
2011-05-09, 23:25
knock knock

Gray Blazer
2011-05-09, 23:37
Alaska

....

Lugnut
2011-05-10, 00:06
See there SolarBronco, we've gone from a hilarious first post down to knock knock jokes. Sure you want to be around this bunch? :albertein

SolarBronco
2011-05-10, 01:29
You are my kind of folks. I tell all kinds of crazy jokes on the trail, drives my friends nuts, but they keep coming with me for some reason..

Oh yeah, it's cause I have a ton of gear to loan.

sheepdog
2011-05-10, 10:25
knock knock

who dat??

sheepdog
2011-05-10, 10:26
Alaska

....

Alaska who?





this is getting confusing

Gray Blazer
2011-05-10, 10:51
Alaska 'nother knock knock joke.

Knock Knock.

Hog On Ice
2011-05-10, 10:53
who dat??

banana

Kanga
2011-05-10, 13:30
baaaaaaaaaaaaaaanananananananananananananananaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!

john pickett
2011-05-10, 14:22
baaaaaaaaaaaaaaanananananananananananananananaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!! who?

Tin Man
2011-05-10, 14:44
what are we kids now?

Hog On Ice
2011-05-10, 14:54
kids have more fun - banana

Skidsteer
2011-05-10, 14:58
what are we kids now?

Whaddya mean, now?

Tin Man
2011-05-10, 15:02
Whaddya mean, now?

kids, kids... vs children :D

Kanga
2011-05-10, 21:23
what are we kids now?

naner naner boo boo.:aetsch:

sheepdog
2011-05-10, 21:27
I'm not touching you :bike:

Bearpaw
2011-05-11, 19:48
naner naner boo boo.:aetsch:


I'm not touching you :bike:

Me neither. I bet she has cooties! :ahhhhh:

warraghiyagey
2011-05-14, 10:29
An owl walks into a bar and the bartender says 'hey owl, how's your brother?' and the owl says 'who?'

warraghiyagey
2011-05-14, 10:30
:star::star:

jrwiesz
2011-05-15, 11:37
no the guy on first

Hog On Ice
2011-05-15, 12:36
naner naner boo boo.:aetsch:

booner booner na na.:aetsch:

JoeyB
2011-05-15, 23:28
an amnesiac walks into a bar, says to the bartender, "do i come here often ???"

Ray
2011-05-15, 23:34
A dyslexic walks into a rab...

sheepdog
2011-05-16, 18:03
A dyslexic walks into a rab...

is that an ethnic joke??

Kanga
2011-05-18, 18:56
booner booner na na.:aetsch:

i like the way you say it better.

JoeyB
2011-05-19, 20:16
A fifteen year old Amish boy and his father were in a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again.

The boy asked, 'What is this, Father?'

The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, 'Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life. I don't know what it is.'

While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat old lady in a wheel chair moved up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened, and the lady rolled between them into a small room.

The walls closed, and the boy and his father watched the small numbers above the walls light up sequentially… They continued to watch until it reached the last number, and then the numbers began to light up in the reverse order.
Finally the walls opened up again and a gorgeous 24-year-old blond stepped out.

The father, not taking his eyes off the young woman, said quietly to his son..... 'Go get your mother'

JoeyB
2011-05-19, 20:18
An 86-year-old man goes for a physical. All of his test results come back normal.

The doctor says, " Howard everything looks great. How are you doing mentally and emotionally? Are you at peace with God?"

Howard replies, "God and I are tight. He knows I have poor eyesight, so he's fixed it so when I get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, *poof* the light goes on. When I'm done, *poof* the light goes off."

"Wow, that's incredible," the doctor says.

A little later in the day, the doctor calls Howard 's wife. "Vickie, he says, Howard is doing fine but I had to call you because I'm in awe of his relationship with God. Is it true that he gets up during the night and *poof * the light goes on in the bathroom, and when he's done, *poof* the light goes off?"

"OH MY GOD!" Vickie exclaims.
"He's peeing in the refrigerator again!!!!"